My love of football can partly be traced to Roy of the Rovers. I was not around when the weekly Roy of the Rovers story started in the first issue of Tiger on 11 September, 1954 but when the stand alone comic began in 1976, I followed the exploits of Roy Race religiously until the tragic closure of the comic on 20 March, 1993. For me, Roy of the Rovers represents the glamorous and unpredictable nature of football with last-minute goals in Cup finals and a never-say-die attitude which I try to take with me every time I step on the pitch. Some of the Roy of the Rovers story lines are unforgettable. For example, in 1981, Melchester Rovers were sensationally relegated to Division 2, Roy was shot by Elton Blake (in my world this story was much bigger than 'who shot JR Ewing?') and Sir Alf Ramsey took over as caretaker manager. During the 1982/'83 season Roy did the unthinkable and joined Walford Rovers but his heart wasn't in it and he returned to Melchester the following season to lead the Reds to an FA Cup final victory ... over Walford, of course. Melchester's summer tour to Basran in 1986 coincided with a coup by native rebel forces and eight team members, including Vic Guthrie, Kenny Logan, Jimmy Slade and Trevor Cassidy, lost their lives. The surviving players were rescued by an SAS unit. In 1987, Roy's son - Roy Jr - ran away from home and in 1988 Mel Park (home ground of the Rovers) was destroyed by an 'earthquake' (caused by the collapse of old mining tunnels under the stadium). Three years later, Roy rejected an offer of €8 million to become manager of the USA national team; 1991/1992 saw him set a new English league scoring record of 436 goals; he resigned as Melchester's player-manager live on Sky TV in 1992/1993 but quickly changed his mind. At the end of that fateful season, Roy crashed his helicopter and was left critically injured and in a coma. He came out of the coma to learn that his famous left foot had been amputated. Roy's next move was to leave England to take over as manager of Italian side AC Monza, leaving Roy Jr (aka Rocky) to continue his father's tradition at Melchester.
What a man! Thanks for the memories Roy. Every kid needs a Roy of the Rovers in their life.
7 comments:
Summary: It's a cup final - Melchester are playing in the Cup Final against Merseyside/Yorkshire United/Tyneside/Kensington/Whitechapel United/Islington/Sherwood Forest/Insert thinly-veiled reference to First Division (old) club.
Minutes before the game... Racey is mugged/diagnosed with food poisoning/gets on the wrong coach (or train or tram)/is rendered unconscious by a blow to the head thus preventing him from playing. Or, in an alternative scenario, 'Chopper' Jones or 'Hacker' Hunter or 'Drunken Duncan' McKay from the opposition team negates Roy with a reducer 'early doors'.
Either way, Melchester concede 2 sloppy goals while Racey isn't on the pitch. Racey manages to make a miraculous recovery just in time to score two goals (at least one of which is his trademark rocket) and make another. Another cup for Melchester.
Great comic strip. I seem to remember that the Kemp twins from Spandau Ballet played for Melchester for a while (to tap in to the emerging Smash Hits market) and I remember Dynasty-style sensationalism in the late 80's (kidnappings, murders etc.).
Great times but it wouldn't work today. Not because the kids have playstations, wiis, ipods and youtube... but because no comic strip writer could come up with stories as surreal as current events at Spurs, Newcastle, Man City et al.!
Actually the comp might be better, Aodh, if people had to suggest original future stories for Racey and co.
Here are a few suggestions...
1. Racey goes to the World Cup but walks out after an argument with the manager over training facilities.
2. Racey and his Melchester teammates make an inappropriate video while holidaying in Ayia Napa
3. Roy takes to visiting the brothels of Melchester to indulge in a granny fetish he has developed.
4. Racey becomes a metrosexual and has an affair with a translator at the club but gets caught out when his 'racey' texts are printed in a tabloid.
5. Melchester is taken over by a wealthy Russian Oligarch with a shady past.
6. Racey goes shopping and 'forgets' about his mandatory drug test.
Oh wait...
Roy of the Rovers wasn't all about Roy Race though. It was the other stories down the years that I remember more clearly. I also had a lot of time for Roy's buddy Blackie Gray.
For me the best was 'The Safest Hands in Soccer'. Gordon Stewart playing for Tynefield. What a keeper. The other great story was Billy's Boots. Billy found a pair of old boots that belonged to Dead Shot Keen. And the boots would put Billy into the position he needed to be to score the winning goal. Of course he was absolute muck without the boots so every story involved the boots being thrown out/stolen/lost etc and being discovered just in time.
Hot Shot Hamish appeared in RotR when Tiger stopped as well. And then Mighty Mouse joined Princes Park. Actually it's fairly obvious now that Might Mouse went on to lead the PDs and serve as an incompetent Minister for Health.
The other great stroty in RotR was Johnny Dexter - the 'Hard Man'. I think he signed for Mechester at one stage. (This was probably in the 90s when I shouldn't have been reading comics).
But please allow me one tangent which is to remember Scoop comic - which i really liked. And it's on my mind because of Jon Stark 'Striker for Hire'. No win - no fee. I just wish i could find him now while Noel Browne remains injured. UCC United could use him!
Roy Race's left foot was amputated. Ah Aodh, say it ain't so! That has completely ruined my weekend....
Jeremy and Deckie,
Thanks for your comments and the trip down memory lane. 'The Safest Hands in Soccer' - a blast from the past. Gordon Stewart's son, Rick, continued the family goalkeeping tradition with great success. Johhny Dexter was a teak-tough defender in the Jamie Carragher mode. Remember his crazy manager, Victor Boskovic? Happy memories.
"Billy's Boots" is an interesting one. Isn't it just the least bit ethically questionable that a poor player could use magic boots to improve his soccer skills?
"Arsene's Creatine Team", "Jaap's Nandrolone", or "Mutu's Bolivian Marching Powder" wouldn't make it in to a children's comic. Is Billy's Boots any different?
If he was eligible for UCC United I wouldn't mind if he wore the Boots every week.
And I'm not sure we'll ever have a test for spirit possession.
Post a Comment